Saturday, July 7, 2012

Let's get real.

Soooooooo the whole making changes to my diet thing? Yeah hasn't been working as of now. I've been super stressed out lately and even though I really could blame my terrible eating habits solely on this fact, I won't. Honestly, it's for a lot of reasons, really. No time, the stress thing, no money to buy healthy food or food in general, and so on. Truthfully, those are all excuses. I mean, the real reason it hasn't worked out for me so far is that well, I'm kind of lazy, or I have been, when it comes to eating well and exercising. It's sooooo much easier to make a McDonalds run than it is to cook something I may have in my house already. It's also a lot cheaper. However, McDonalds food isn't as satisfying, at least for me, as a good and healthy cooked meal. It doesn't keep me full and I really feel like shit after I eat it, mentally and physically.

The food journal idea was good in theory, that is when I was eating things that were semi-healthy. However, after about a week of doing it, I gave up. I was finding that it was just a hassle and that it really wasn't helping me feel anything but ashamed of eating that taco bell three or four times in a week....which in turn, only stressed me out more, and only made me turn to bad food again. Gahd. As you can probably tell, it's been really frustrating for me. I mean, it's summer, people. There's a ton of BBQ's and other situations with friends and family that food is involved in. Most of the time there aren't healthy options available and if they are,you tend to feel left out because everyone else is eating the stuff you want.

Over the last few weeks I've been eating even worse than ever, I feel. After going nearly 7 months with out coke a cola, I went off the wagon :/ it SUCKS. In this past week I've had at least 3 large sodas and I'm really mad at myself about it. I hate feeling like crapola all the time and getting headaches and breaking out from drinking it and yet, there I go, drinking it lol. I really do want to eat and be a healthier person, it's just a lot harder than I ever imagined. I mean, when you think about it, it's not too hard to believe. You're brought up with all these unhealthy foods that you love and then during college you eat mostly bad things because, well it's college. Coffee and soda also come in because you have to stay awake somehow!

Anyway, babbling done for now. Basically, I'm going to re-start this healthy-eating thing. I'm going to take baby steps, again, but in a different direction. The number one thing is going to be cutting out all soda again, all over again, ugh. That's probably going to be the hardest. Then, I want to make small changes to my diet on a day to day basis, using things I can afford. I figure if I don't go to a fast food place or just grab something because it's quick and easy, I can put that money towards buying ingredients for a REAL meal. The thing is, I really do love healthy food and I love EATING healthy more than I love to eat the bad stuff. So yeah, frustrating and challenging as it is, I'm not giving up just yet :)

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